Thursday, July 12, 2007

Well, DUH!!!

I've been reading books and stories about hospice care, and thinking all along it was to help prepare me for my new job when we get to Salem.

In an older post I talked about a switch God pulled on me. I realized today He did it again.

As excited as I am about moving back to my home State of Oregon, the roots I have grown here in the Bay Area are deeper than I realized, and I had a "Well, DUH!!!" moment just now as I was reading about pain and loss.

I began crying at work, and am finally just beginning to realize the pain and grief I am bearing about leaving the San Francisco Bay Area. It has been my home for 20+ years. I experienced rebirth here and have grown up as an adult here. I was married here and have spent my entire 18+ years of married life here!

My employer wants me to read the books they sent me because I need to learn about how to care for people in their last stages of life.

God loves me too much to let that be the only reason. He is having me read the books so I can have help dealing with the loss and pain and grief of leaving my home and friends and family here. Today was my first real wake up call of how deep that pain will be/is becoming.

I didn't see that coming.

Dang!

~ Keith

2 comments:

LL said...

we love you with all our hearts, as we love the Bay Area...

our thoughts and understanding are with you as you transition into this next phase of life...

Sandy said...

I think some of us out here "on the fringes" have been feeling some of this pain before you and Cathy, because we are the ones having to say "good-bye" without having the "hello" in our future! I suspect that God almost blinds us with excitement, fresh hope and renewed joy to get us on our new way; then he reveals, one glimpse at a time, what we are actually leaving behind. If we saw it all up-front, we'd never follow his voice! May God hold you both very closely as you transition into your new world. You are sooooo loved!